AFIA'S DIARY

A single picture became my motivation to the beginning of this journey. I never wanted to get my picture taken because I knew I had packed on some weight. There came in the comments from my course mates telling me how fat I’ve gotten and so on. Some even went to the extent of saying I’m not coming to class because I said I’ve gained weight; that was sad.  The comments they passed did hurt but it didn’t motivate me to change my lifestyle. As time went by, I got so used to their fat body shaming and comments. But what they didn’t know was the fact that I had already given up on myself: so nothing they said was actually going to push me to change. Even with that I’ll start eating healthy for a minute, hit the gym and give up on that same week. Until my course mate took a picture of me when I wasn’t looking after I had instructed him not to take any picture of me.  A single picture became my motivation to the beginning of this journey. My first look at the pictur...

25 25 25…..they say it’s my birthday lol. I thank my Heavenly Father for this day. I truly believe that with Him I am nothing. I am grateful for this new age, his grace and mercies. One thing i also know is that, today is not just my birthday but my mother’s too; if you know what I mean. I sincerely dedicate this day to my mother, Olivia Afia Konadu Nyame.  She has been my biggest inspiration in my life. She taught me how to be a real woman, to have strength and self-respect, and to never give those things away. She brought the world to my feet; even when she couldn’t afford it. She made sure the world loaned it to her…for the sake of her daughter.  All I remember is your back. Walking towards the airport leaving us in your past. Piece by piece, she collected me up off the ground where you abandoned things. Piece by piece she filled the holes that you burned in me at 10years. And you know my mumzy never walks away, she never breaks my hearts, she takes care of th...

I want to shed a tear, For how I've been made, For how life has treated me. I want to shed a tear, For the chances I've missed, For the times I've wasted. I want to shed a tear, For my poor heart, For how many times it has been broken, For so many years of waiting for something real. I want to shed a tear, For my life, For how 24 years of emptiness has been, For the love and peace there will never be. I want to shed a tear, For the people I've met, For how selfish they have been, For taken me for granted, For draining my soul and energy. I want to shed a tear, For me, For all the things I've lost, For my father, For how distance has separated us. I want to shed a tear, For the baby sister I never had, For walking alone in this world, For not being able to read the note I wrote to her, For dreaming about you everyday, For accepting that there will never be you. I want to shed a tear, For love, For all the men I've lost...

Somehow I found myself gaining almost 40 pounds of the 100 pounds I lost back. Yeah I can say Christmas took a piece of me. Growing up as a  “FAT” girl, I must say it was never an easy thing. I can tell you that I saw it and heard it all; ranging from nasty comments to the dirty eye looks. People treated me as if I wasn't good enough. I can honestly tell you that they treated me as if I had HIV/AIDS. It was as if being “FAT” was disgusting. Nobody really liked or loved me genuinely. Most of the times, I had to trade something for the company of others. My friend Winifred Oberg was always around. And I didn't really get why she always wanted to hang out with me. Until I lost the weight and I knew that was love. My mother was always there willing to support me in every way.  I had low self-esteem due to the constant hearing of the negative comments. I was looking for acceptance from other people and none of them gave me. Sometimes the nasty comment from people was too ...

Before the end of this year, I wanted something to blog about. So I sent a whatsapp broadcast to some of my contacts asking them on what to blog about. My former Broadcast Journalism lecturer gave an answer and that instant it seemed pointless to me.  He said “You can blog about something else. Take a break from your life at least this season”. It took me two months to finally get what he was actually trying to say to me. When I woke up today everything he said finally made sense and I get it now. If you my readers really observed, I never posted any New Year resolution like I've done for the previous years. Well it’s because I figured out that there was no need putting a list down and ignoring it to do other things. My resolution was to make a resolution every day of my life. That is, go through something and take the lessons from it and actually work on it. The blog started as a weight loss blog. When the goal weight was finally achieved, I made it all about me. A perso...

I'm ending my writing for the year 2016 just like how I do it at the end of every year. Normally I write this at home or at a party but for this year,  i'm writing it in an OA bus heading to Kumasi from Tamale. I had to go for one of my childhood friend's wedding. I don't know whether 2016 has been a good year or not. Infact it has been a bittersweet year. There were times I made bad choices but trust me I really did learn from them. I had my own fair sharing of crying and laughing. I met new people and they have been very amazing. I fell in love of course  with someone I shouldn't, someone who painted me black but I also learned from it. I also started my specialization this year, that is Broadcast Journalism and there's never a day I have regretted chosen that course. I got to know how to take care of myself in my own terms and not what people wanted. I got to live on my own in my hostel. My weight was definitely unstable this year too, I've been gaining...

                  Dear Mom, I know all the girls I grew up with are getting married, you've seen and heard it all. I'm sure in your minds eye you've been saying "soon it will be my daughter's turn". Which daughter??? Oh is that me???  .  Oh Mumzy I appreciate that thought. I'm sorry to disappoint you but I'm no where near that phase. I wish I was though. Mom,  I can't even get a man and I'm not ashamed of that. its not my fault that i'm too emotional for them.  Secondly mom,  i'm still finding myself let alone a soul mate. i'm just saying. Lastly, my new career path which ends when I'm 33 years. The conclusion of this letter to you mom is that, sadly I can't keep a man for even 2 years in a relationship let alone get one for a lifetime. NB: Dear Mom, after my second degree,  I'll be 33 years. I'll get married and give birth for you if only I get and keep a man. But if things continue...