STARTING WEEK 9....DAY 64-70 AT 87.8KG (193.5LBS)

Oooooook so where do I begin!! There's so much I want to say to make it easier awwww I'm overwhelmed. Honestly so many people thought I wouldn't last on this diet, my neighbours and even my mum did. Mum knows how very weak I am, I'm a pushover so everyday she kept on asking are you going to eat real food today hahaha and I just roll my eyes and go like you know I don't eat that lool but deep down I just wanted to eat that. Yes I admit that I let things get into me even people I don't even know can sooo really get into but this is me. Starting week 9 I hope its going to be successful like week 8. I'm glad I didn't binge last sunday hope this sunday to will be the same!! Honestly I was afraid to take this step but I took it anyway and I'm glad I did!!!! Keep your head up!!! The best way to gain self-confidence is to do what you are afraid to do.

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TIED TOGETHER WITH A SMILE

Seems the only one who doesn't see your beauty Is the face in the mirror looking back at you You walk around here thinking you're not pretty But that's not true, cause I know you..Hold on, baby, you're losing it The water's high, you're jumping into it And letting go... and no one knows That you cry, but you don't tell anyone That you might not be the golden one And you're tied together with a smile But you're coming undone I guess it's true that love was all you wanted Cause you're giving it away like it's extra change Hoping it will end up in his pocket But he leaves you out like a penny in the rain Oh, cause it's not his price to pay Not his price to pay...

LEARNING

IF YOU HAVE NEVER BEEN FED LOVE WITH A SPOON, YOU WILL LICK IT OFF A KNIFE AND YOU WILL BLEED. This is one of the favourite quote of my friend Sam. To able to understand this quote, I personally feel that you must go through unrequited love and any form of abusive relationship. t he beginning is this magical, amazing time. But the beginning is not built to last. After the beginning comes the real relationship and if it’s not a match, then things will devolve quickly. What are you really invested in here? A lot of the times we’re in love with the potential of what could have been, not the actual person. It’s so easy to project our wants and fantasies onto someone, especially someone you hardly know. this devastation we experienced is because of what the other person represented to you. what you’re lusting for isn’t the person, it’s how it used to be. You miss the beginning of the relationship, and you hold onto it as proof that you guys were in love once upon a time. Everyth...

THE GRACE OF GOD

A single picture became my motivation to the beginning of this journey. I never wanted to get my picture taken because I knew I had packed on some weight. There came in the comments from my course mates telling me how fat I’ve gotten and so on. Some even went to the extent of saying I’m not coming to class because I said I’ve gained weight; that was sad. The comments they passed did hurt but it didn’t motivate me to change my lifestyle. As time went by, I got so used to their fat body shaming and comments. But what they didn’t know was the fact that I had already given up on myself: so nothing they said was actually going to push me to change. Even with that I’ll start eating healthy for a minute, hit the gym and give up on that same week. Until my course mate took a picture of me when I wasn’t looking after I had instructed him not to take any picture of me. A single picture became my motivation to the beginning of this journey. My first look at the pictur...

AFIA'S DIARY

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